Monday, April 30, 2007

the penis and the salary

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

1. I do physical labour.
2. I work at great depths.
3. I plunge head first into everything I do.
4. I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
5. I work in a damp environment.
6. I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.
7. I work in high temperatures.
8. My work exposes me to diseases.
_______________________________

Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the management denies your request for the following reasons:

1. You do not work 8 hours straight.
2. You WORK IN SHORT SPURTS AND fall asleep after EACH brief work period.
3. You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
4. You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen visiting other locations.
5. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
7. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
8. You will retire LONG before you are 65.
9. You are unable to work double shifts.
10. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.
11. And if that were not all, you have constantly been seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

Sincerely, The Management

Saturday, April 28, 2007

unzip my body, take my heart out.

Could a body close the mind out
Stitch a seam across the eye
If you can be good, you’ll live forever
If you’re bad, you’ll die when you die

Hearing only one true note
On the one and only sound
Unzip my body
Take my heart out

'Cause I need a beat to give this tune

Taking a picture of
Taking a picture of
Taking a picture of

Oh the body swayed to music
Oh the lightning glance
If I would give it all and all
Maybe you would hear me
Ask for half a chance

And if I need a rhythm
It’ll be to my heart I listen
If it don’t get me too far wrong

Taking a picture of you
Taking a picture of
Taking a picture of me
Taking a picture

Ramalama Bang Bang
Flash Bang Big Bang
Bing Bong, Ding Dong
Dum dum d’ dum dum

With a hammer Bang Bang
Flash Bang Press Gang
Bing Bong, Ding Dong
Dum dum d’ dum dum

With a st’ stammer
Bang Bang
Crash Bang
Big Bang
Boing Boing
Boing Boing
Dum dum d’ dum dum

---

Ivan's sensational in this dance!

Thursday, April 26, 2007

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaance.

Been watching SYTYCD2 again since I was in a procrastinating mood. Was reminded of how much the following dances touched me.

Allison & Ivan performing Why



Allison & Ivan performing Sexy Love



These two had such great chemistry... Made the audience feel for them as a couple. The RnB item is just hawt.

Allison's last dance



She was my favorite! Sob. Love this performance because it's filled with such raw sadness. I guess it helped that she just found out that she's being booted out huh.

Speaking of SYTYCD2, I just realized that Benji, the winner, is featured in Christina Aguilera's Candyman. I think I have the YouTube vid under the March archive. Glad to know he gets jobs out of the show! Apparently he turned down the contract to perform for Celine Dion that was part of the prize 'cos it wasn't his style of dancing.

B..a..h. Back to schoolwork & tidying up of room. Well maybe after a short nap.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

dating & talking cock

Yang's just forwarded me this article from TalkingCock. It's hilarious! At the same time thoughtful, but I guess the thoughtful bit is lost on a blue IC holder like me. Unlike the nice normal pink IC holders, PRs are more likely to distance themselves away from potentially controversial political discussions. And when everyone else on the island is sweating away in the voting queues we could sit one corner and drink milkshake.

Anyhoo. Been holing up at home to do work the past few days. I have a distinct feeling that I'm getting lazier. I just have neither mood nor energy to socialise. The only friends I see are my project group mates, and even then we don't meet up for long because I have an ADD problem. The downside is that when I do decide to doll up and go out I get sloshingly drunk. Holla bash... not good. Not good at all. It's all a bit of a blur but I remember screaming like a horny hen-partier at Gotham strippers, making friends with the security personnel, toasting strangers and finding everything extra super dooper funny.

I also went out to get my 600 poker chips, which were detained at the SingPost building because my seller didn't include the invoice in the package. But thank goodness I didn't have to pay any taxes on it. When I was handed the long thin box holding the chips I paused for five seconds thinking, "How on EARTH am I gonna get this shizzle home??" because y'see, it was heavy. As in heavier than I expected. As in I walk five steps cradling it like a baby and then my arms want to drop off. Boy you gotta love cabs.

Au contraire to what is visible in school, I am single. I get nosy people like Mr Low Xu Yang (who's gonna intern at Deutsche PB and get paid $1.5k... RAAAHHHH!) asking me who's the 'dear' in the previous post. Eh, hallo, it's Sydney lah. I was feeling depressed so I called her because I knew she would give me tough love. I'm actually a rather unwanted spinster.

'Eh, are you back together with Gary? I see you with him in school all the time!'
Naww, we parted amicably and vowed to remain friends and we did. Have to be civilised with each other since we're in the same project groups for 2 modules.

'Eh, are you seeing X???'
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Whoever that X guy is, he is very lucky to be associated with me. Ho ho ho... Seriously tho, not seeing anyone. Just friends.

In fact, I've been hanging out with girls so much lately that my FATHER actually expressed CONCERN.

Father: Are you OK?
Me: Eh? OK?
Father: Ya. Are you?
Me: Erm, I think so? Why?
Father: Just want to make sure you're... normal.
Me: Wha-
Father: Oi. Don't laugh, this is serious business.
Me: OK OK don't worry I'm normal.

But even if I weren't, what's wrong with being a lesbian, hey?? I bet it beats fanning a man's ego and letting him get the upper hand. You never know where he'll put it.

Friday, April 20, 2007

=)

Thank you dear.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

... i'm never ever going to club ever again

While Mel's driving the backseaters took the first ever picture for the night


Demure pose


Take a super big gulp of grape soda mixed with... heh heh somethin' else


The (relatively) early bunch


With (RED) Syd


Excuse me don't hog the camera!


My fave pic


Jianxiong took my drinkkk


Vikkkieeeeee


'Model' pose 1


'Model' pose 2


Two handsome boys lookin' for lurrrveeee


What a bunch of posers! Hehe


Vik's drunk too... I think!


In the club with Jess


Three of us! Been a long time since we got together to take a picture in a club

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

when you're losing when do you give up?

I remember writing a depressed entry about not being able to get an internship some time ago. Well, five failed interviews later, I'm still singing the same song. So in the face of rejection, what do you do? Do you just admit that it's time to start looking at something not so glamorous? I've been aiming the top, so maybe it's time to check out the lower ranks? But oh, I could just imagine the discontentment I'd feel and the whatif's that would poison my brain and the questioning of self-worth.

Yet I have honestly done my best. I have talked about yen carry trades, about natural hedges and forward contracts, about how we should just keep releasing British sailors so that oil prices would stay low, about the burgeoning growth in China and the political constraints its electricity demands are causing, about the mad dash to sell off Treasury bonds in the face of inflation, about CAPM and Black Scholes and speculating and valuating and trading and selling.

Maybe I AM just not good enough. I have to admit that sooner or later. Maybe I'm just good enough to get to the last four or to the last two but I just don't make the cut. Maybe someone else displays more confidence, more capability, more grasp and knowledge about the markets. Maybe someone else knows programming, treats the Bloomberg machine like his lover, and can quote the closing price on any stock without blinking.

Maybe my competitor(s) could make even the fiercest interviewer laugh, shed a tear, say the words, "You're hired!"

Maybe I should just be content and be proud that I have had the opportunity to compete with these amazing people.

But I can't. Because it's a zero-sum game and if they win that means I lose. And oh God do I want this most recent internship! It is just perfect. Please don't let me screw this one up. Please let them just call me tomorrow and tell me it's all over and I got it. Please. I will work my ass off, go home at midnight everyday and be there at 6 am to prepare morning notes.

I guess all I could do is hang by the phone all day tomorrow and if it doesn't ring, then I'll know that I'm already defeated.

Friday, April 13, 2007

hit by the gurrgh argghh blearghh's

Can't seem to make myself do anything right now. Nothing feels good. Blearghhh. Gonna play some hocus poker =(

Friday, April 06, 2007

everybody loves a good tournament

MOTOROKR-E6: Damn hotttt I want!

Thursday, April 05, 2007

ethics is a hydra!

I tell ya Ethics is best taken in small doses. Been reading up arguments and counter-arguments about workplace discrimination, corruption and corporate social responsibility for ages. I feel like my head's gonna go kaboom.

Tomorrow my bed will become my exam venue. This is the first and hopefully last time it's gonna happen! The Ethics exam is semi-take home (question gonna be posted on Vista, allocated time's 9 am - 4 pm), which is a rather strange hybrid because it's more like a prolonged open-book exam to me. I just hope I won't oversleep and wake up at 2 pm. That'd be a disaster fo' shure.

When I first started learning the subject I thought it was going to be yet another pointless took-it-cos-we-had-to module. But actually after reading the articles I discovered quite a few interesting points. I was especially captivated with Milton Friedman's eloquent essay. If you want to mince words, the essence of the essay is that the business of business is to do business, argued on the basis of capitalism as opposed to collectivism. I found it hard to digest at first and had to re-read it but goodness can the guy write! Despite the fact that some of his statements were rather extreme, I couldn't help but feel the commanding force of his words.

Why Ethics is a hydra
Because when you think you've killed off all existing arguments new counter-arguments are already growing and sprouting and doubling up in place of the dead ones.

It's irritating and you can't win, but still quite interesting anyways.

Monday, April 02, 2007

i only want sympathy in the form of you

Ashlee & Dmitry from So You Think You Can Dance 2 performing a Contemporary item! Kinda lacking in technique but I love the Coppelia concept!



Dance, dance
We're falling apart to half time
Dance, dance
And these are the lives you'd love to lead
Dance
This is the way they'd love
if they knew how misery loved me