Monday, August 15, 2005

lesson #217: love lessons learnt

Realised a couple of things through chatting with Jun during dance just now. Didn't know why, the thoughts suddenly popped into my head out of nowhere. These things are:


1. When in a quarrel with your significant other, try to think through those angry words that you might wanna say. Usually mean things are exchanged in an attempt to hurt the other party, but what we don't realise is that in the end, the words will come back to hurt us like a boomerang. Might as well keep quiet rather than say things that you'll regret.


2. In accompaniment to point number 1, try to cool both you and your partner down. This is SO easier said than done, especially in the heat of the moment! But it's really a good tactic, because once both parties cool down, it's easier to start talking nicely.


3. Usually arguments will come to a standstill. To use war terms, it's like when you're in a siege and neither party want to yield (ie. be the first to say 'sorry'). You might not think you are very sorry at the mo, but somebody has to start apologising first and if the partner's still looking pretty stubborn and bull-like after the first 2 points have been done, there's no choice but to sacrifice that pride for peace. (Stooping low and apologising when you think you're in the right might feel sucky, but try to see it from an outsider's point of view. The more humble, cool-headed, mature person is always regarded with more respect.)


Aren't they deep?? Cool huh. Now all I need to do is follow my own advice.